2006- one for the books

As we say goodbye to 2006, let’s look back and remember what happened…

You, in review:
*Age: 23
*Location: Athens, GA
*Work: UGA Center for Continuing Education
*School: University of Georgia

This year, have you:
*Fallen in love: I think so
*Fallen out of love: perhaps
*Had your heart broken: sure
*Cheated in love: don’t think so
*Cheated in life: I sure hope not
*Cried: yeah man
*Laughed so hard you peed your pants: at least once a week
*Dumped somebody: no
*Lied to get ahead: no
*Gotten married: no
*Had a baby: no, but Fe did! yay for baby RJ!
*Adopted a pet: no, but I almost got a pet turtle
*Gotten a new job: can’t say that I did
*Learned a new skill: I learned how to let people in

That’s life:
*What is the biggest lesson you learned this year: God is faithful in EVERY circumstance
*What was the hardest thing you did: accept the call
*What was your greatest accomplishment: accepting the call
*Most painful experience: the death of my grandmother
*Favorite memory: Spring Break in Orlando
*Greatest change in yourself: being able to be encouraged in every situation
*Something you’re proud of doing: trusting God enough…

People:
*What one person would you thank for what they’ve done for you this year: My grandmother
*Who did you learn to hate: I don’t believe in hate
*Who did you learn to love: They know who they are
*Who taught you the best lesson: Everyone I encountered taught me a valuable lesson
*Who made your life most miserable this year: life will never be miserable- as long as i’m alive, it’s GREAT
*Who gave up on you this year: I dont think anyone did
*Who believed in you: My family, the Whole, Fati, TJ, Crystal, Camille, Willie, Juelle, Superstar, Ty, Rell, Twilla, P-Dub, Fe, Lauryn, Nigel, Tristan, Jeshua, and many, many, more…

Favorites:
*Restaurant: Applebee’s, Olive Garden, On the Border, Ruby Tuesday, Inokos
*Place to shop: NY and Company, MAC Counter, Gap, Target
*Drink: Water
*Food: Lasagna, Mac and Cheese
*Music: Fred Hammond, Kirk Franklin
*TV Show: Desperate Housewives, Grey’s Anatomy, Gilmore Girls, 7th Heaven,
*Hang out: anywhere with my girls or anywhere with P-Dub, Fe, and Lauryn

Resolution for next year: Stay positive, stay focused, stay faithful, stay encouraged…

I’ve been in GA too long

I know that I’ve been in GA too long because this doesn’t even bother me, and while I’m embarrassed to admit it, I LIKE IT. We’re all entitled to our guilty pleasures…

Just hope I don’t break this out at the Christmas party this weekend…

wltx.com | Teacher makes controversial comments about race

An example of what’s in America’s classrooms today…

Further motivation for me to finish this degree and get into the classroom and get to work.

The Power of Being Alone

The other day I realized that since I’ve graduated, a good number of people I know have gotten married or engaged. The marriage bug is in the air, and I believe it’s quite contagious. It’s exciting that people are finding their life partners and that God is (hopefully and prayerfully) blessing their unions.

My lack of dating has made my mother very nervous. Especially since I know so many people who have gotten married or are getting married. It’s interesting that my mother has switched from the mantra of “you can do bad by yourself” to repeatedly asking “So does _________ (insert name of person that she recalls me speaking of) have promise?” or “How’s _________ ?”

When I moved to GA, I went on this whole “independent woman” kick. Well, not really. But for the first time in my life, I was content in being alone. Anyone who’s known me, would know that I’ve (for the most part) always been in a relationship. It might be sufficient to call me a serial monogamist.

Anyhow, it was an empowering experience to be able to grow and explore a new environment for myself. I did things on my own terms. I did things that I wanted to do. I allowed myself to get to know me. What I like. What I don’t like. What I could potentially like under the right circumstances. What I would never like under any circumstances. I developed a great relationship with myself.

Part of the reason that I felt that it was necessary to move to Georgia was so that I could learn how to make it on my own. North Carolina was great. Chapel Hill was awesome. And I did things on my own in Chapel Hill. I was pretty good at paying my rent, getting my car taken care of, and handling my business. But there was always a safety net there. My family was always able and willing to come to my rescue. It’s a blessing to have family who are there and who are supportive, but there are some things that you learn by striking it out on your own.

I believe that there’s a certain power in being alone. In doing things for yourself. And let’s not make the mistake- being alone doesn’t equate to loneliness. There are times when I’m all I’ve got- and that’s definitely enough…and sometimes too much . At some point, I’ll join the ranks of my married friends. But until then, I’m growing in the power of being alone and enjoying it.

So, here’s to being alone and doing some work on what lies beneath the tip of the iceberg. As I’ve said before- the majority of the damage done to the Titanic was caused by what lies beneath the surface. Likewise, we will be destroyed not by what exists on the outside, but by what is inside of us.

Peace and Blessings, all!
Be Encouraged!

That "N-Word"

What Papa Irvin Says…

Worth Quoting from the above article:

“I never understood why so many folks within the black community were willing to drink the poison of labeling one’s self as a nigger, degrading one’s self and one’s community, not just in America, but throughout the world – through videos and hip-hop and rap music, et al., all the while dancing to the pseudo-African rhythms in which some singer calls a mother a “bitch” or sister a “ho.”

I saw it as a pact made with the entertainment devil, recalling that the devil always demands his due – a note that Michael Richards paid when he shouted “niggers” right back at the audience.

Some blacks justified their use of the term as an expression of love and endearment, a homeboy kind of thing, noting the distinction between the “-igga” version and the “-er” version – and figuring that whites and everyone else would somehow know the difference between the two. This was supposedly their way of removing power from the word itself.

It may have felt good for a while, but a black person calling himself a nigger is like terrorists using suicide bombers to destroy their enemies – only to find out that once they internalize a willingness to kill their own children, they have unleashed a cultural virus.”

I guess people were surprised about Michael Richards. I don’t know why. I feel like I’m walking around people everyday who, under the right (or wrong circumstances), would call me a nigger. Shoot, they may have already done so, but I just haven’t heard them. I don’t believe that all people are like that, but I’m not surprised when they are. Racism and racist ideologies permeate our country. Oppression exists. We’ve just cloaked ourselves under political correctness so that these things aren’t as open as they used to be.

Michael Richards has apologized for his comments. And while I’m sure that he wishes he could change his words; I’d rather he change his heart.

Regenesis

I haven’t posted here in a long while. Partially because of time and partially because of other reasons. I haven’t really felt like I’ve had much to say and many of the things that have interested me haven’t gotten enough of my attention for me to write about it.

I think that I’ve “sold out” somewhat on this blog. I started it as a way to express myself and my feelings, really nothing more than a journal put on the internet. Down the line, there was a shift to current events and other things- all of which that keep my interest, but mostly because I wanted other poeple to read and see what your thoughts were. I suppose it fills a need for constructive dialogue, and that is definitely lacking in my life. When I started, blogs weren’t as popular as they are now. There was not a huge blogosphere, and I definitely did not check other people’s blogs every day (as I do now). Blogging is, in some ways, very commercial. And while it’s a good way to keep up with people, it’s not what I’m trying to do here anymore.

At any rate, I realized that for the most part, I don’t REALLY matter to the readers here. You may read what I write and comment and appreciate what I have to say, but it ends there. It’s not like you’re wishing harm or anything, but you’re not worried about me. I’m sure it sounds horrible to say, probably even depressing and bleak, but it is what it is. I’m on a new journey with my writing, and maybe you’ll continue with me for that. If not, that’s cool too.

“I am invisible, understand, simply because people refuse to see me…When they approach me they only see my surroundings, themselves, or figments of their imagination—indeed everything and anything except me…And my problem was that I always tried to go in everyone’s way but my own. I have also been called one thing and then another while no one really wished to hear what I called myself. So after years of trying to adopt the opinions of others I finally rebelled. I am an invisible (wo)man.”
~Ralph Ellison